Should, Would, Could

So many people go through life without thinking. They are not happy and they say things like, “Well that’s just how things are.” Or “No one said life is fair,” or “Life’s a bitch then you die”. Real life of the party stuff these folks. They are often willing victims of the “should’s”. You will hear them say “I should do this or I should do that” all the while clearly unhappy with what they feel they “should” do.

I say, stop shoulding on yourself! There are some things you should do yes, pay your bills on time, stop and help a stranger who needs directions, keep your self clean, that kind of thing. After that not much else in life “should” be done. You see other people are the ones that started the whole thing. “You should go to college and become a lawyer, doctor, or accountant.” “You two should stay together.” “You should stay here in town and be near your family.” “You should stay at the job, you’re lucky to have it.”

And what is all of that? It is other people’s opinions attempting to form you into what they want you to be. What if you do not want to become a lawyer, doctor or accountant? What if you don’t want to go to college? What if you don’t like each other that much anymore? What if you don’t like your family all that much? Or your job?

“Shoulds” are outside energies forming you. Equalize that pressure by asking yourself, “What would I do if…” What would you do if you won the lottery? Now take away the lottery part and what are you left with? The answer you are left with is what you really want in your life at this moment! Asking the “woulds” gives you opportunity to see what is in your way and the direction you would go if things were different. “Woulds” lead to “coulds” and this is here we start to grow and become happier.

“Coulds” are the energies inside you forming your life without interference from other people’s opinions. “I could go to California.” “I could change my position at work.” “I could apply for a different job, one that I actually want.” “I could get the training I need to accomplish that.” “I could get a roommate to help with the bills.”

We are always going to be connected to others and we are not suggesting here that we completely ignore their feelings, but if you are not happy or they are not happy in the current situation, ask yourselves, “What could we do?”

Once you begin this process you find that your world expands with possibilities. Limits seem to melt away and you become a possibility thinker. Once you start to see the possibilities available, the “should’s” and the “woulds” seem to dissipate. Without “should’s” or “woulds”, what could you do?



© 2007
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